My Team is better than yours, therefore you are Stupid

I’ve been programming for over 20 years now, and from the day I started programming I came across of language wars. Hell, I was even involved in many over my years. That is, during the foolish days of my youth… (like I never get caught in them today!)

But lately I’ve noticed them and they seem especially vitriolic. Not to pick on anyone especially, but these are some of the ones that got me thinking [1], [2], [3] (Clarification: I referenced #3 because of the comments it received, not because of the original post), and a lot more (but those are the ones I remember.)

It seems to me to be mirroring the macro world today. People all over are feeling frustrated and upset, and just generally seem unhappy. In the US it was probably triggered doubly by the dotcom bubble bursting and then 9/11, but I believe outside the US there are other more varied and in many cases more pervasive drivers.

I was talking to Scoble the other day and he was able to put it into words where I have previously failed. He called it the "My team" mentality. Everyone seems to be abandoning logic for emotion, choosing sides, and rooting for their team. You know the type; those on my team can do no wrong and those on the other team can do no right.

So in that spirit, I want to provide you with numerous viewpoints:

  • I am Muslim and you are Jewish, therefore you are stupid.
  • I am Jewish and you are Muslim, therefore you are stupid.
  • I am Muslim and you are Christian, therefore you are stupid.
  • I am Christian and you are Muslim, therefore you are stupid.
  • I am Christan and you are Jewish, and my enemy’s enemy is my friend.
  • I am Jewish and you are Christan, and my enemy’s enemy is my friend.
     
  • I went to Harvard and you went to Yale, therefore you are stupid.
  • I went to Yale and you went to Harvard, therefore you are stupid.
     
  • I went to Public School and you went to Private School, therefore you are stupid
  • I went to Private School and you went to Public School, therefore you are stupid
     
  • I drive a Ford and you drive a Chevy, therefore you are stupid
  • I drive a Chevy and you drive a Ford, therefore you are stupid
  • I drive a Chevy and you drive a Ford, and my enemy’s enemy is my friend
     
  • I live in the city, and you live outside the city, therefore you are stupid
  • I live outside the city and you live, therefore you are stupid
     
  • I live uptown and you live downtown, therefore you are stupid
  • I live downtown and you live uptown, therefore you are stupid
     
  • My team is the Yankees and your team is the Mets, therefore you are stupid
  • My team is the Mets and your team is the Yankees, therefore you are stupid
     
  • I have a college degree and you do not, therefore you are stupid
  • I don’t have a college degree and you do, therefore you are stupid
     
  • I use a PC and you use a Mac, therefore you are stupid
  • I use a Mac and you use a PC, therefore you are stupid
  • I use Linux, therefore you are stupid
  • I use Open Source, therefore you are stupid
     
  • I am in management and you are in the union, therefore you are stupid
  • I am in the union, and you are in management, therefore you are stupid
     
  • I am on the west coast on you on the east, therefore you are stupid
  • I am on the east coast on you on the west, therefore you are stupid
     
  • I live in the US and you live elsewhere, therefore you are studid
  • I live outside the US, and you live in the US, therefore you are studid
     
  • I live in US and you live in Canada, therefore you are stupid
  • I live in Canada. Have a nice day, eh?
  • I live in Quebec and you live in Ontario, therefore you are stupid
  • I live in Ontario and you live in Quebec. Have a nice day, eh?
     
  • I am Republican and you a Democrat, therefore you are stupid
  • I am Democrat and you are Republican, therefore you are stupid
  • I am Libertarian and you are Republican, and my enemy’s enemy is my friend
  • I am Republican and you are Libertarian, and my enemy’s enemy is my friend.

 

Now with that backdrop, how does this sound?

  • I use C# and you use VB, therefore you are stupid
  • I use Java and you use C#, therefore you are stupid
  • I use C# and you use VB, and enemy’s enemy is my friend
  • I use VB and you use VBScript, therefore you are stupid.

 

Pretty stupid, huh? Come on all; programmers are supposed to be logical. A collective positive attitude goes a long way towards improving everyone’s lot. Can we not use our logic to solve problems for the benefit of all rather than engaging in all the petty squables?

(I don’t expect this post to change anything, but hope springs eternal…)

4 Replies to “My Team is better than yours, therefore you are Stupid”

  1. Nice thoughts Mike. My sentiments exactly. For a profession (or is it a hobby?) that requires smartness(sp?) and logic, there sure are a lot of stupid tags being lobbed about. When it comes to languages I think the quote that sums it up best is "the only language no one complains about is the one no one uses"..or something like that.

  2. I’m wondering why my post in response to Kathleen Dollard’s hobbyist article was included as one of the example "language wars."

    There was certainly some "warring" in the comments section, but not in my post.

    It’s especially odd considering how little I have to do with language wars. I have preferences, and I sometimes state them, but I never blindly defend one language just because it’s "my team."

    I guess I should give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you meant to point to the comments, but you seem so precise that I don’t see any reason to do that.

  3. >> I’m wondering why my post in response to Kathleen Dollard’s hobbyist article was included as one of the example "language wars." There was certainly some "warring" in the comments section, but not in my post.

    Yes, it was because of the comments made others on your post, starting with "TJ" and his comment "Can I just say that I despise VB.net programmers and everything they stand for."

    My sincere apologizes if it was construed by anyone to be about your post. I’ll update in a minute to clarify.

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